Taiwan Calls on Ozzy for UN Membership Effort

If someone asked me last week to put "Taiwan," "United Nations" and "Ozzy Osbourne" into a sentence that made sense, I probably would have looked bewildered, stuttered and muttered something incoherent. Basically, I would have done a faithful Ozzy impersonation. Ask me this week, however, and I've got an answer. English rock legend Ozzy Osbourne has been enlisted to help Taiwan gain entrance to the United Nations. Pretty good sentence.

Taiwan has attempted to join the U.N. 14 times. Taiwan has failed to gain admittance to the U.N. 14 times. The island China considers it's "breakaway province" has tried numerous media and political campaigns to drum up international support for U.N. membership to no avail. This year, the Taipei government will try something different. As far back as 1973, Taiwan has applied under the name "Republic of China" and every time China, a nation with a veto vote that considers the island as part of China, blocks the island's application. Instead of repeating the failed strategies of the past, Taiwan's government is planning a referendum next year to apply for U.N. membership under the name "Taiwan." And instead of appealing to America as it usually does, this year the island will appeal to the soft-on-Satan singer of Black Sabbath and MTV reality star Ozzy Osbourne.

The Ozz is supporting the U.S. leg of the world tour of Taiwanese goth-rock band ChthoniC, who will be the musical ambassadors of the next Taiwanese push to join the U.N. ChthoniC will tour 80 cities in America, Canada, Britain and Germany over the next 5 months to spread the pro-U.N. message by distributing literature at shows and traveling in a large tour bus with a pro-U.N. slogan. ChthoniC has even written a song appealing to the U.N. to let Taiwan in. Ozzy will foot the travel expenses for the shows in America.

ChthoniC's singer Freddy Lim says, "I'm not for any political party, but I'm for my poor country joining the United Nations."

Strangely, even despite Ozzy's action in Taiwan's U.N. bid, the United States is still against it. While Washington has a long-standing pro-democracy stance toward Taiwan, the U.S. has consistently refused to nudge Beijing to allow Taiwan's independence and any measure, such as U.N. membership, that would recognize Taiwan as an independent territory. According to the secretary-general of Taiwan's Democratic People's Party, 71% of Taiwanese are in favor of applying for membership as "Taiwan," even without American support.

As former U.S. state department official Randall Schriver put it in a Asia Times editorial Thursday, "The core challenge faced by U.S. officials when such matters are considered comes from the tension that emanates from asking two questions: How can the U.S. be pro-Taiwan, but not anti-China? And how can the U.S. be pro-democracy, but not pro-independence?"

One would assume, of course, that answers to these questions will soon be found, for as Ozzy once said on his TV show, "Oh come on Sharon! I'm fucking Ozzy Osbourne, I'm the Prince of fucking Darkness. Evil!"


-David Flumenbaum



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